Oh-kay kids. Time for uncle Jeff to start another ramble trail, since I couldn't find anything to review this week.
Today I'm going to attempt to focus my ramble today on one subject, although I'm sure it will spawn off into one thing or another. It's probably going to turn more into a rant about this subject, but stick with me. Some of you might even relate to this.
So today's topic... online dating.
Now a few of you know that I have participated in such a thing throughout my time in college. Today, being alone on a boat for almost 8 months does take its toll on you. So since I cannot have an animal to keep me company I decided to try it again. Thinking "hey, it's LA, gotta be people who'd be interested in a guy like me, right?"
So I filled out the profile, put up some pictures, and sent some messages. This is OKCupid I will be talking about first.
In this instance, the phrase "you get what you pay for" applies. Now I've only been at it for about 2 days, so I may be judging it too harshly. BUT when the only ones that are sending you anything are obese women with two children... well there's a problem going on here.
Now not that I mind people having children, but do I look like I want your problems on my shoulders? Not only children, but that you won't take care of yourself physically, why do I want that? Now not saying that I am in the best shape, but jeez, I take care of myself. I'm a nice guy I know, but I am not going to shoulder your problems for you. I may have baggage, and I'll except some baggage considering the source of the people I find, but I'm 24 years old. I barely manage to support myself.
It goes without saying as well that anyone worth ANYTHING on these kind of sites have a billion messages a day, so they have to weed out all the crap to get to anyone good, but I bet most of those get deleted too. And if they are worth anything - they have a life to live - so the person you're trying to contact never actually goes to the site after a week. Or never really checks their profile periodically. Mainly they visit for that one moment of boredom. Then forget they have one.
I've had a fraction of success from this particular website. The closest I got was this crazy chick who was afraid of being attacked by tornadoes. In her defense she was traumatized a bit, but still, life goes on with or without you. She chose to live in fear, and I couldn't deal with that.
I'm more cautious of services you pay for like E-Harmony. I suppose I might have greater success in a city like LA, since people are actually paying for this thing they'll actually give people a chance. Actually visit their profile more than once a decade. I did a free trial on there when they would allow you to look at your matches for free (I was in Indiana when I did this, so brace yourself) and I had fewer matches there than "matches" on OKCupid. And these matches were too similar for my tastes.
So I have come to a couple conclusions about my experiences with this:
1. The kind of person I am, or the person I am looking for is too unique and would not ever be caught on these sites, or ever take them seriously.
2. Anyone looking on these sites are pretty freaken desperate.
3. People on these websites have self esteem/ self images issues and feel that they are not going to be taken seriously in real life, or not given a real chance.
Says a lot about me, eh?
I suppose an overlaying problem I find in this situation is that when we as human beings thin we don't fit in normal society, we turn to things like the internet, AIM, social networking sites cause it help, we think, to show who we truly are. But in reality most people, like in real life, don't care. There's hundreds of thousand upon a few million of people online a day. What's worse is we don't even have to speak to each other to feel rejected. It all hinges on e-mails and winks now. We're devolving as a specious when we don't even want to communicate face to face anymore. That's my main problem with modern technology - it has made us lazy and fearful of actual human contact. Perhaps this dependency is a sign of weakness in people, and how like nature tends to do it, only the strong will survive.
A side note, trying to relay yourself to other people is just kinda awkward. I mean, I'm not normally told what the first thing people notice about me is, so how do I know what to say?
I have not tried e-harmony here in LA, nor speed dating, as again, I'd rather spend what little money I have on sure things, like food. And it seems no one I know knows anyone datable. Most of the people I know are in their 30s and up. Hell one is in their late 50s. And even in their 30s, some people are still children. It bothers me sometimes when I see people like that, not wanting to be judged on their actions, when they put themselves out there TO BE JUDGED - they will be even when asked not to. You cannot sit there, make out with five people, and asked not to be judged. ( I exaggerate here, but I hope you're following). I question their stability as people.
I have questioned a lot in my time in LA. I've gained a lot of experience in learning how to live and how people are. LA has the worst kind of people in most company - shallow fake people who are only in it for the glamor. This especially sucks when I want something more out of life these days. Something real. Something in the now. Something I can be proud of that I can associate with. Sometimes I don't even like to be called an American.
In the world we live in today, we cannot pride ourselves on "being American", we're not that great, and other countries over the years has put us on this high pedestal, and we fell like a rock over the last four years. I promise not to go into a Bush rant, but let's face it, it's hard not to associate our recent predicaments without his presence.
Today, everyone has to be apart of the global community. We cannot rest all responsibilities on the shoulders of America. Nor on any other one country. We have to work them out together, or risk becoming the dinosaurs. http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090924/ap_on_go_pr_wh/us_obama
I hope I've kept the focus here today for the most part. One subject seems to roll into many yet I think they are all connected in their own weird ways. Next time I'll try to have a review ready to keep my posts a little lighter. I'm sure I have a game or movie somewhere I don't really care for that I can tear into.
Until Next Time....
ps. Bonus points for whoever can guess the picture... hell some of you know I'm sure.
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